Monday, 29 June 2015

Dating Thai boys (31) Boyfriend candidate 2 (2015)

Dating Thai boys (31) Boyfriend candidate 2 (2015)

Fri 05.06.2015 Farose 2 Sauna
Wander around, number of customers estimated 50 at 1 am, changing room busy. Spot 3 boys who are my type. None of them shows interest. One takes a bath in the pool (first time I saw people swimming in the pool with fountain outside). His friend chats me up (in Thai) and asks me what my type is, I point to the swimming boy. Then talk with the swimming boy and suddenly he suggests we go to the sauna or steamroom. I take off my underwear before entering steam room (so it doesn't get wet, I have no change), that seems to puzzle him. But once we are inside, it takes the expected course.

We change from steam room to shower to sauna; then I probe if he is free tomorrow and suggest we go to my room, he agrees without hesitation. (ChristianPFC thinks that sauna is a poor place to meet sexual partners, and an even worse place to have sex, but if you are looking for unpaid sex, there are no alternatives – online dating is even slower.)

Sat 07.06.2015
Back in my room, it gets even better: he wears the same underwear from swimming (I like the style, but it's still wet), so I hand him my bag with sexy underwear and boxer to choose some to wear for the night. Poor sleep due to a lot of hugging and cuddling during night (I am used to sleep alone), with a sex session around 7 am. Great sex, not only my type, my style as well (as I already found out in steam room and sauna). Finally we get up 1 pm. He plays internet all day, I do some reading (as my computer is blocked by him). The boy has no mobile phone, uses mine to call friends and family. Apart from that, in and out of bed everything great.

Then 7 pm, we take taxi to go to his family in Ngam Wong Wan (about 20 km ride). Spend the evening there, with two changes of location (by taxi, a few km). Family and neighbors gamble (Hi-Lo, wads of 20 Baht notes, some 100 and 1000 as well), utterly boring. Finally 00:30, we take taxi back. On the street and walking to main road to get a taxi, he remembers he forgot to take fresh clothes, but we continue. Then in my room he tells me he cannot go sightseeing with me tomorrow unless he can get fresh clothes.

Just when I want to sleep, we have the following conversation (as far as I understood):
Do you think there will be love?
I like you.
Yes, but do you love me?
We will see.
Suddenly he remembers he has to return the room key (to whomever) and gets up. He will come back after returning the key and picking up fresh clothes. I think there is a connection between failure to declare my love for him (24 hours after meeting!) and him having to go back to his room

By coincidence, I have an extra valid Thai SIM with 60 Baht balance, and an older phone which I give him so he can call me when he comes back. That phone has sentimental value, is has some old SMS from 2009 to 2014 (which show that Thai dating has been as difficult as described here from the very beginning). The battery will last for two days, and you need a special charger (which I have in my room).
That phone is English only (cannot display Thai text).

He is already out of the door, but a few seconds later he knocks, if I can give him money for taxi. That's 24 hours between meeting and first money request! I give him 500 Baht. Add other expenses and we reach 1000 Baht, and 6 hours spend together out of my room driving in a taxi or doing stuff that is utterly boring to me (I spent part of the time reading on my phone), just to show my commitment, and we are getting in the range where offing a boy would be a viable alternative. But this boy is a great match in bed!

Art leaves 1:40 am, I am on the internet until 3:00, waiting for him to come back, in vain. (It took us 20 minutes from their place to my room, this means he must have gotten side-tracked and will probably not be back this night.) I put my phone on ringing (when I'm awake it's on vibration, when I sleep I often switch it to airplane mode), which means every SMS with advertising or invitation for a game on Line could wake me up.

Sun 07.06.2015
For my readers’ entertainment, here all communication in chronological order:
11:39 Art doesn't pick up
11:53 Art's mother calls from Khon Kaen and asks me to tell Art to call her back
Day out sightseeing.
15:24 Art is not well, sounds like I woke him up, meet tonight.
17:29 Not forthcoming, call again 8 pm
20:00 Art doesn't pick up. I’m just back home and will spend the rest of the night waiting for him (but I didn’t know yet at this point).
20:31 Art will come to see me, no eta (estimated time of arrival) due to traffic jam.
22:32 "Welcome to call-back service"
22:35 Art will arrive midnight.
23:47 Art calls from taxi (but doesn’t sound like taxi).

00:13-49 His friend Wut messages and calls me on Line and wants to know where Art is and if we had sex (ask an educated Thai friend to translate “not your business” in this context: ไม่ใช่ธุระ mâi chai tú-rá).

00:29-34 I call Art, he is in Ladprao, no background noise. I cannot fathom what is going on (taxi refuses to take him because Sathorn is so far? What is he doing in Ladprao?), after hanging up and realizing I haven’t gotten any further after 5 minutes on the phone, have to call again.

00:35-39 He wants to meet tomorrow, I finally get to a point that he comes now (I hope he understood that the battery will only last one day more!)

01:11 Call Art, just arrived.

Monday 08.06.2015
Get up 10-12 (prolonged, I am still awake, but Art), then sex. Art stays in all day. In the afternoon, I meet Farang friend in the area, do laundry, clean my bathroom. We have a nap together 19-21. Talk about trip to Khon Kaen (his home province) together on Saturday.

Tuesday 09.06.2015
Get up around 12. Internet, read books and magazines (while Art uses computer). Take Art to local bank branch (he is waiting for money from his mother?), preparation to go out takes him half an hour! I have an appointment with a friend in Ladprao, I will be out of my room from 17 to 22, after some pondering I let Art stay in alone.

Wed 10.06.2015
Art goes to Ladprao to pick up some cosmetics (actually he wanted to do so yesterday, I thought we could combine it with my trip to Ladprao), and I go to hairdresser. He never used MRT and will not use bus because he doesn’t know the way from bus stop to his destination. He asks for money for cosmetics (there were hints the days before, I saw a price of 890 Baht), but I don’t want to get involved and give him just 400 Baht for taxi return.

Finally 13:30 we are both out of the door (I was kind of holding the door handle for half an hour waiting for him to finish preparations for departure), with understanding he would come back in the afternoon. He takes his bagpack with him, a sign that he probably will not be back today.

I am back 15:30 and message him on Line. Slow in reply, but then as I expected: he is in his room and cannot come to see me because he spent all the money on cosmetics and has no money for taxi. Fine, meet another day.

Fri 12.06.2015
Ask on Line if he will go to Khon Kaen on Saturday. Slow in replying: cannot, working in Bangkok.

We write on Line every few days, but haven’t met him again.

Some general observations:
After sleeping together (next to each other) over night, we get to this halcyon state where our bodies, mattress, duvet are in thermal equilibrium (maybe love and sex is just a question of thermodynamics?), and where I just have to hug him to get an erection. But then he gets up and takes a shower, and even worse applies various cosmetics!

For sex, I want the boys in natural state, no cosmetics, I don’t like the smell and taste, not even fashion contact lenses. This boy is obsessed with cosmetics, how I can sort this out?

He makes a mess in the bathroom (water, powder, cream splashed everywhere), but he folds duvet and clothes. A big step up from the previous boyfriend candidate, who puked on my door mat and turned it around instead of cleaning it.

I am not happy with him eating stuff from my fridge without asking me (not that I wouldn’t share, but it would be a waste if he ate delicacies I brought from Germany when is just looking for any food), moving my laptop and eating while using it. But I didn’t address these issues, because I thought he would be gone before it becomes serious, and I was right.

He borrowed a T-shirt and underwear and still has it, and one T-shirt and underwear from him are left in my room.

Copyright 2015 ChristianPFC


  1. Don't give up on him too easily, if you just need to hug him to get an erection it's good sign. You are not stranger to boy's bodies after all.

    Now I know what did you do past parting our ways on that Friday evening after visiting X-Size together. I went to Tawan as reported on the GayThailand board

  2. maybe love and sex is just a question of thermodynamics?
    I do not have the answer to this (rhetorical) question. However, living together with a Thai boy is completely different question. The boy is not total idiot and he quickly estimated your financial capabilities. Your chances to have live in Thai boy are equal to zero due to your financial constraints. Forget about it. If you like to have sex with him, try to arrange meetings with him from timeto time and provide financial incentives if necessary. That is your best shot. Cohabitation with Thai is more a question of financial engineering than thermodynamics (from molecular level standpoint).

    1. Good points by anonymous. He finally did not qualify as boyfriend for several reasons: obsession with cosmetics, the usual problems when dating Thai boys, I have seen cuter boys. Hence no live-in with this one. But there was a glimpse of boyfriend when we first met.

      I deliberately did not shower him with money to see how big a factor money would be. I met only few boys who can withstand the allure of Farang money, he is not one of them.

      When I meet him again, I will make a clear cut: like but not love, financial support in exchange for sex.

      That sounds so much focused on sex, but what else can we do if we share no interests? I would take him on trips but he doesn't seem interested (there were two chances already) and with poor communication it would be a waste of time and money (this applies to many boys I know).


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