Details about how my phone got stolen and general thoughts about mobile phones, data backup, security. May this be a warning to my readers.
At the moment I use three mobile phones: Samsung A9pro I have been using for years, it's getting slow and some other other issues. Camera poor. I call it “slow phone” SP. Samsung Galaxy Note20Ultra I bought a year ago for its great cameras and general faster than SP. I call it “camera phone” CP. Even after one year, I haven't transferred all apps from SP to CP and use both in parallel. Everything that is easily transferred (facebook, instagram, hornet, just log in and have full functionality and access to all messages in parallel on both phones and laptop), I use on CP. Line, grindr, blued, online banking on SP.
And a Redmi Note 6 Pro that I got for free and sometimes use for navigation with offline maps and to take notes. The idea is to have a cheap phone that I have in and out of my pockets all day when traveling, either offline or with WiFi hotspot from SP or CP. This would be the one I'm using 90% of the time when travelling. If someone grabs a phone out of my hand while I'm using it, 90% chance it's this. Or if someone steals one of my phones, there is a 50% chance it's this one. But in this case, it was in my bag, and anyway, the thief knew which phone to steal.
Similar for wallet. I have a wallet just for money and keep everything else separate. Might even add a decoy wallet that is empty.
Sun28jan2024 Phnom Penh riverside
A guy from grindr messages me. No face picture in profile, but sends me soso pictures on request (soso means not a clear hit, but can't dismiss him either). He is nearby 244 m and eager to meet, I agree. Asks for my phone number for telegram and we exchange some more information on telegram.
Meet him in front of my hotel 17:51. For statistical purposes, I note times for every date. First impression: “Oh no!”. A bit on the fat side, skin rather pale, and even with face mask I can see he is not cute. I should have made a video call on telegram, then I would not have met him. But now he is here, it would be impolite to send him back.
To my room. I don't like his voice and difficult/fuzzy/demanding/bossy character. During his stay, complains twice about aircon and lack of drinking water. Asks me to take a shower, even though I showered just hours ago and spent the time afterwards in my room with aircon. But refuses to shower together.
I go to bathroom with my trousers (wallet, both mobile phones SP and CP), everything else in my room is of little value and easily replaceable except laptop, but that's too big to steal). I come out of bathroom in towel. He goes to take a shower. I realize I forgot to my trousers in bathroom. He locked the bathroom, I knock on door, he says he is on the toilet, so I wait until he opens the door and take back my trousers. Both phones and wallet in trousers. Hours later, I notice something I had in my pocket lying on floor, that means he had his hands in my trousers. That was not an opportunity theft, but the plan was from the very beginning! Wants me to brush my teeth, which I refuse. However he brushes his teeth.
Then he has call from work and tells me I can continue working on computer until he is done. How strange! Then we can finally get to business. Lights off on his request. Warm and dry skin, but pale and fat. Tattoo two birds on chest. Versatile, small dick. I start with hugging, but he says he likes to cum fast. Asks me if I kiss, no. Wants me to rim him which I refuse. He states that we do not match and that he would go home. Glad that we can end it that quickly.
But there are some delays from his side during dressing. I have a double bed room and he sits on the bed which I use to put my clothes and other stuff on, like my phone for charging or my trousers with wallet and phone. I work on computer and with SP while he gets dressed. Bye 18:21 in my room. Normally I would have inconspicuously checked that both phones are still with me, but somehow missed this time.
Continue work on computer, and get a message from him on telegram on laptop “are you angry with me?” or similar. When I want to go out for dinner 19:35, I notice CP is gone. Check grindr and telegram, both chats gone, i.e. he blocked me. In hindsight, there was no information on grindr or telegram that would have lead to identification. I remember I accepted his contact request and had a look at his profile, no picture and no phone number or ID displayed.
Report theft to reception and ask them to keep surveillance camera videos and show it to me later. Message a Farang friend and a local friend to check if they can see his profile (by location and my description of profile picture). They can, and he is nearby.
When we chatted, he told me he works in laundry. I check on google maps for laundries nearby, there are only 7 within 300 m from my hotel. Go to check all of them and ask for his name. During following days I realize there are dozens more that are not on google maps. In the meantime, a Khmer friend comes to meet me so he can do the talking and we can use his grindr to find the profile. Walk around and use “travel” functionality to find the last location. That leads us to northern end of street 63, the T-juction of street 63 and Central Market. Now 21 o'clock, we ask everyone who is still out on the street, and the one shop that is still open (but not for business, their staff have party), to no avail. But there are several mobile phone shops, come back tomorrow when they are open.
Security camera from hotel show him blurry and with mask, of little use. But I have his DNA and fingerprints on toothbrush he used! And his fingerprints on kettle he touched (I clearly remember he touched the kettle side, whereas I only took it by handle). Now I realize irregularities in my two backpacks, he had his hands in them as well.
Try to create a new grindr account on my Redmi phone, “registration error” that did not go away by the usual methods (waiting, close app, turn phone off and on) over the next days. There is even
https://help.grindr.com/hc/en-us/articles/4402066647187-Registration-troubleshooting and
https://www.wikihow.com/Grindr-Registration-Error which confirms, grindr is the crappiest (the slowest loading and most crashes) of the dating apps I use regularly (blued, hornet, grindr).
Mon29jan2024 Phnom Penh
Walk from my hotel to his last location (street 63, south of Central Market) and ask in every mobile phone shop along the way. There are a lot, about 20, but only 10 of them have a Note20Ultra and only 5 of them in black and those I immediately recognize not mine. Now I know what Note20Ultra looks like from behind (cameras), I don't have to ask any more, just look at their display. Prices 420-450 USD, with one outlier 490 USD in pawn shop. But then I find one that I recognize as mine. Ponder what to do, then tell the seller the story. He is adamant he got the phone a month ago together with other phones. I buy my phone back for 450 USD in hope to be able to restore data after factory reset.
In hindsight, should I have offered the seller money to tell me identity of thief, in case they take the ID of everyone who sells them a mobile phone? Or offer the police money to get that information for me? Do they even register the ID of people who sell them phones? Did the thief use a fake ID? But why would he make that effort? There are many shops, it was pure luck that I found the one who has my phone, and still that information of no use to catch the thief.
Spend the rest of the day trying to recover data from phone with various programs (DroidKit, iMyFone D-Back) and to root my phone, to no avail. Search for data recovery in Phnom Penh, and find one who will try.
No appetite, depression, no energy for anything. Postpone all plans for sightseeing and boys I had for the week. This theft cost me a week that I was feeling miserable.
Tue30jan2024 Phnom Penh
Submit a report to grindr. I ask them specifically not to ban the profile so I can warn others and track his location, but they do exactly that. I should have know that at best no help can be expected, and at worst sabotaging my effort. Empty phrases. But these days I have a lot unrealistic and stupid ideas, like finding the thief by DNS analysis.
Bring phone to data recovery specialist. He works on it for two days, to no avail. But cost me only 15 USD, have to try.
Wed31jan2024 Phnom Penh
Search on internet for DNA analysis and fingerprint lifting in Phnom Penh. Nothing useful.
Search facebook and Instagram for the name he gave me, in English and Khmer. That sounds like a lot of work, but it isn't because most profiles can be ruled out just by scrolling in the list, and more in preview, and only few require a few seconds look. I can go to the end of lists and spend about half an hour. The name might be fake, but he might be friends with one of my other gay Khmer facebook friends, which would put him on top of the list and I would recognize the face. No luck.
Put a warning on facebook. Beside the expected reactions (gay jokes “Are you top or bottom? I might know were else you can find DNA samples” and general ridicule), some condolences and one other victim.
Thu1feb2024 Phnom Penh
Finally manager at my hotel (where I have been staying many times since 2021, so I hope he does his outmost to help me) has time to go with me to district police station. The police station is not on google maps, I wouldn't have found it, leave alone make myself understood (manager translates). While we are there, a report of a tourist found dead in hotel comes in and all policemen will be required on that case. We have to come back tomorrow. The following days, I couldn't find anything in the news about a dead tourist.
I got away lightly with just having my phone stolen. Spare a thought for our gay brethren in Latin America, where not just theft, but robbery and drugging and killing occur during dates.
The tourist police station has such bad reviews on google maps, I didn't go there. They might have people who speak English, and offering money would have gotten them to do some work?
Fri2feb2024 Phnom Penh
I start messaging other foreigners on grindr, warning them of the thief. In the course of two days, 54 profiles (foreigners) within 1 km (as far as I can go with free version). Message some of my Khmer friends as well. With picture from security camera, I ask in restaurants I frequent and tuk-tuk drivers standing on road. In total I told (either in person or online) over 100 people; 1,999,900 left in Phnom Penh to tell/ask.
Manager and I go to police station again to file report. Takes half an hour. 15 USD tip to officer.
I get more ideas: security cameras from nearby and from mobile phone shop where the thief sold the phone. However, they wouldn't give the footage to a stranger, and I guess he wears a mask throughout in public, would be no clear face picture. Follow him on general security cameras in town, if they cover all areas and all have the same time and I can get the footage.
Sat3feb2024 Phnom Penh to Saigon
Leave Cambodia (one day later than originally planned), but I'm still not over this. And it will take weeks until I have everything set up new: get new SIM-card with same number. Can't use Thai online banking and Transferwise because they are linked to that number. Install apps and log in.
More thoughts in no particular order:
I could print the picture I have from our security camera and details in Khmer and offer a reward and hand it out in increasing distance from my hotel, or post it, hundreds of copies. Or just to gay bars and saunas. Or put an advert in newspaper, radio, TV or social media in Khmer. However, such action could get me into trouble.
How can I use AI to search on social media for pictures of shirtless Khmer males 20-30 years old, about 60 kg 170 cm, with bird tattoo on chest?
Grindr would forward his registration data to local law enforcement agencies. But how do I get an english-speaking Khmer police officer to take over the case and request the data? Is it that simple (email from Khmer police to Grindr), or will paperwork and official translation and what else be required? Ask a visa agency: they can't help me.
Certainly best order would have been to warn other profiles following day, and not report to Grindr.
I would spend hundreds of Dollar trying to catch him, and thousands to put him in jail. The problem is, I need someone who knows how to deal with Khmer police in such cases. None of my Khmer and foreign friends in Cambodia have an idea.
All my readers in Phnom Penh are asked not to dismiss a message from a faceless profile, but engage in chat to see if it's the same. The face pictures he will send won't be good. When you open a private album on grindr, you can't take a screenshot, but can take a picture with a second device. Whereas on blued you have to hold the screen, you have have to be skillful with both hands or need a second person to take a picture. He is about 25 years, 60 kg 170 cm, pale skin, speaks good English.
I think I have done everything sensible to recover my data and find the thief, now I can only wait for him to continue and make a mistake, or contact my fake or friend's profile.
However, what to do once I have his identity is not straightforward either. I would need to know his status or background (might be middle class), and need other's experience and data (where to report, how much I would have to pay to get police to do something) to put him in prison. If I do it on my own, police would laugh at me or rip me off.
To steal money is a honest business. I am missing x, the thief has x, I go to ATM and get new, and I'm over it. Stolen passport probably only by mistake, the thief was reaching for wallet? Of no value to thief, but trouble for owner. Mobile phone or other electronics a little financial gain for the thief, a big financial loss for the owner and data loss and trouble setting everything up on a new device.
If reception keeps ID of visitors, they would have to take a picture in case theft is noticed only later.
My two-phone policy kind of worked out. I have most apps in parallel on both phones and can continue with SP. Others who have everything on the stolen phone have much bigger inconveniences.
Data backup
Real men don't have back-ups. I have three. Unfortunately, there are gaps of weeks in backup of data from stolen phone. I will have flashbacks for months or years: I have a photo of that, no: I HAD a photo. Recently a friend recommended BART https://www.zhornsoftware.co.uk/bart/ for computer, and I have been using it ever since. So good, I would even pay money.
Lock phone
Most of my friends have their phone locked by PIN or pattern. My phone was unlocked, and if we assume I use my phone 60 times per day and unlocking takes 1 second, that would be 6 hours per year, 60 hours in 10 years for phone unlocking that I saved.
But a locked phone would not have prevented theft, just make it less valuable for the thief.
Talking about this subject with friends, I learnt that a locked iPhone cannot be unlocked, but still has some value for spare parts. Even if the thief gets the phone in unlocked state, a factory reset would require PIN or pattern or fingerprint or face.
The Redmi I use as third phone, I found in garbage in fully operational but locked state. With a bit of search on internet, I found how to factory reset it from locked state.
If your phone is locked by PIN or pattern, and you are on a date, the prospective thief could spy out your PIN or pattern. A friend said nowadays phones can be unlocked by face (with PIN or pattern as a back-up in case face not recognized), being as fast as an unlocked phone.
Summary
Apart from money (450 USD to buy phone back, 15 USD attempted data recovery, 15 USD for police report), this theft cost me a week that I was busy with the aftermath or no drive to do what my original plan was, and I will have flashbacks for months.
You could call the theft an occupational hazard. If you do the same potentially dangerous activity repeatedly, no matter how much precaution, accidents are going to happen. Airplanes crash, nuclear power station fail, spaceships crash, even though the best people work on it.
Average 1 theft in 100 encounters. However this might be that in 100 encounters there are 10 thieves who don't find an opportunity, and in 100 encounters there are 10 opportunities, but no thief.
Previous thefts reported on my blog, and this case on sawatdeenetwork:
https://christianpfc.blogspot.com/2017/04/dating-thai-boys-50-thieves.html
https://sawatdeenetwork.com/v4/showthread.php?23186-Thief-in-Phnom-Penh
update: https://www.moneycontrol.com/news/trends/google-maps-helps-man-nab-thief-recover-his-fathers-stolen-bag-and-phone-12194991.html
Copyright 2024 ChristianPFC except picture
