Sunday, 5 October 2014

Dating Thai boys (17) Asymmetries

Dating Thai boys (17) Asymmetries

Dating Thai boys is an asymmetric operation.

1. Commitment

When I have an appointment with someone, even if we didn’t meet before and only know from online, this is my highest priority. Whoever calls or messages me, I will tell him I am not free now. For the Thai boy I am going to meet, however, I am just an option, a lower option to be precise. If anything better comes along, he will go for it. If I’m lucky, I get a cancellation.

2. Accessibility

I have had the same phone number, gayromeo profile, facebook profile for years. Many of my Thai friends change phone numbers and gayromeo profile more frequently than I change my underwear. I have my phone with me and can be reached by call or message any time (except the 9 S, see below). With Thai friends, there is frequently “cannot connect to this number” and similar. That might be a question of money (pawn the phone, cannot top up) or lost phone or empty battery. I have never (!!!) lost a mobile phone, some of my friends lose their phone every year. I once ran out of power, and that was deliberately, to see how exact battery percentage is.

This can lead to weird situations: I was with some friends who didn’t have a phone at that time, and I got several calls from an unknown number (Thai, couldn’t find out what he wants, in that case they simply hang up and call again later, hoping someone else will answer) until they told me it’s one of their friends, trying to reach them by calling my number.

The 9 S are: sleep, shower, shit shave, sex, sauna, massage, sport (running or swimming), cinema; in these cases my phone is switched to airplane mode or I don’t answer. (Sometimes when I travel by bus or train, I switch it to airplane mode as well. Whoever calls will assume I am in Bangkok, but I’m away.)

I have been in bed with a boy, hugging and cuddling, and suddenly a mobile phone is vibrating. “Is this your phone or my phone?”

3. Money

For basically the same sexual service, I pay 500 Baht in Saranrom, 1000 Baht in Pattaya and would pay 1500 Baht in Soi Twilight (if I ever take a boy from there again). My favorite massage boy gets 1000 Baht, and others who I won’t take again because service was poor got the same (because we discussed this in advance, however in future I will interrupt when I realize it goes wrong and pay less).

Even worse, the more I like a boy who is not a moneyboy, the less money he is going to get. I currently meet a boy whom I consider boyfriend material. He asks for money every time we meet, and I gave him 200 to 1000 depending on situation, but will keep it at or below 300 in future.

I currently have two Thai friends who do not ask for money, and therefore don't get money (but I pay for all activities).

One day I will find a boyfriend, and he will stay with me for close to free.

4. Depth of communication (for lack of better name)

I use phone calls and Line/gayromeo/grindr/sms mainly to set up a meeting, but not for prolonged exchange of thoughts (with Farang friends, I have phone calls up to 15 minutes, but initial idea was to ask where and when we can meet). Some of my Thai friends message me for no apparent reasons (how are you, where are you now, what are you doing, or even worse they send smileys).

Recently, a Farang friend told me about extensive exchange (daily, over months) by email and phone calls with a boy. They have the same way of communication, whereas I would get mad if a boy wrote or called me daily.

When I was in Europe and used online dating, on initial contact, I just figure out if there is mutual attraction, then I will exchange no more than one message per week, better per month, to stay in contact, and finally one week before chance to meet arises, and then I would exchange details where and how to meet.

5. Sleep-wake pattern

I told this before, I usually wake up around 9 or 10, but many of my Thai friends sleep until 12 or even longer (3 pm was the longest). I should wake them up and throw them out (unless we want to go somewhere together), but usually I let them sleep and find some occupation.

Copyright 2014 ChristianPFC


  1. I've said it before and I'll say it again: If you want to find a Thai (boy)friend who is more organized than the average Thai, you need to look elsewhere. College students (and graduates, if you like old guys 555) are a good bet, in general - they need to make it on time for exams, have an above-average IQ, often come from families with a professional or educated background, etc. As far as their looks are concerned, they're all over the place, some even match your considerable list of requirements. :P

    Regarding the first point in particular, if someone is not much interested and shows it that clearly, so that anything else is a better option in his opinion, it's simply a waste of time to keep stalking him. Better use it to get to know others!

    I'm well familiar with most if not all of the negative character traits you've mentioned, so I don't disagree that they're quite common in the general populace. That said, however, why subject yourself to that kind of letdown time and again?

    Finally, I don't think that Saranrom boys and the likes are boyfriend material. There's a reason why they work there, and you will never be able to change their mindset. Just my opinion of course.

  2. I find the more I like a guy the less I will give him a bit strange. Thai guys talk to each other, you think the slut you pay 1500 wont tell the guy you really like, he got 1000 baht more ?
    BTY many Thais lose their phones.. I wonder how many lose their passports !!!

  3. I second Alex's opinion about Saranrom and the like. Old adage ' you can take girl from the bar but can't take bar from her' most likely will apply to Saranrom boys as well. They may be nice and cute but have the way of earning money and unless you lavish money on them they will always follow smell of cash not your internal and external beauty

  4. I'm not looking for boyfriend in Saranrom. I used to stalk even boys who treat me like described above, but now move on quickly.

    The boys I date for free and the moneyboys I entertain are from different backgrounds, there is very little chance they talk to each other. Thus I will never have to justify paying 500 Baht to one boy and 1000 to another boy.

  5. Christian, are there always boys at Saranrom, or only in the evening ?

    1. Only at night. Sometimes from 9 pm, but usually from 10 pm. I would say busiest 10 pm to midnight. Even at 2 am still boys around (reduced number, internet says it can be dangerous after midnight).

  6. Thanks, where is a place to find boys for ST in the morning ?

    1. None that I know of. Online or massage boys from midday on.


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